To be alone forever. Some people’s greatest fear. A table for one at a fancy restaurant, falling asleep in a cold bed, a quiet,-empty house. With no one to share your wins and losses with. No one to witness your happiest moments or comfort you in your most difficult ones.
It’s that sinking feeling in your chest. Imagining that you’re unlovable and undesirable and fearing you might remain that way forever.
But what if we could change our thinking about being single and focus more on the positive aspects of it?
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Movies, novels, love songs, and even scientific research all seem to tell us the same stories: Everyone wants to find that special someone. Once you get married, you will live happily ever after and you will never be lonely again. However, more people than ever before are living single – often by choice. A close look at the best scientific studies shows that people who get married do not end up happier or psychologically healthier than they were when they were single. The stories we have so often been told are distracting us from other stories about single people that we have never been told. The untold stories help us understand why so many people choose single life and thrive there, often finding meaning, fulfillment, autonomy, mastery, rich and varied personal relationships, and sweet solitude in their single lives.
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See Mackenzie perform her winning acrobatic solo “The Party Starts Right Now” in this clip from Season 2, Episode 5, “Brooke’s Back”. #DanceMoms
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Welcome back to another Day in my life vlog, “Living Alone,” I Just want to talk with you guys about some changes I’m making and the direction I want to take my life in this next chapter.
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A podcast only hits the century mark once! And for Mindscape, this is it. There have been holiday messages and bonus episodes and the like. But this is the 100th officially-numbered episode. To celebrate, I decided to treat myself to a solo episode in which I reflect, somewhat non-systematically, on the age-old question of the meaning of life. I end up spending a lot (most?) of the time talking about the meaning of “life,” i.e. what it means to be a living organism in a naturalistic universe. But then I go on to muse about the construction of human meaning in a world where values are not imposed on us or objectively grounded in physical facts.
I think life does have meaning, and it’s important to understand what forms it might take. I settle largely on the idea that humans can conceive of different possible futures, assign value to them, and work against the natural order of things to create something that otherwise would not have been. This is far from the final word, even in my own mind; it’s an invitation to think and converse in a reasonable way about some of the biggest questions there are. Just like the podcast in general.
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After a life-long search for a life-long partnership, after many failed attempts and failed relationships, we may come to a point at which we ask ourselves, ‘Will I ever find a life partner, or will I spend the rest of my life alone?’
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